Soul To Sole Sacred Space

Being raised strict Catholic and then a young adulthood of exploring many religions I find comfort in rituals and know the importance of taking time to connect with Spirit.

I no longer resonate with organized religion, but I do resonate with connecting with other like-hearted Souls with soles (live people, as opposed to just spirit people) and creating a community of both!

Last week I had the awesome opportunity to do the first Soul To Sole Sacred Space devotional hour and it was a game changer. I had the battery power for the difficult week ahead and from the messages I’ve received, it has been a game changer for others as well.

I may not share all my future broadcasts here, in the blog, but here’s the link to the first one so that if you are interested you know where to find us every Sunday at 9:30 am EST. Like me, it is unedited, fresh, authentic and imperfect.

Consider this your formal invitation to join us!

I love you.

~Jade

Life After The Dark

It is slowly all at once, Life after the Dark.

Like the sun, rising on an overcast day, is imperceptible until you suddenly realize it has indeed cleared the horizon and your world once again illuminated…even if through a dull ceiling of clouds.

Yeah, that’s about it.

When I resided in the darkness within the darkness, I had no faith left. That was the scary part. If you are interested, my dark night https://willowsongmedicine.wordpress.com/2019/02/19/dark-night-of-the-soul/

Just as the Light has returned so has my faith, but it is not the same.

It has morphed and transformed into something more solid than before (and it was pretty solid before.) I find myself taking inventory of things “I still believe” and things that no longer seem valid with a whole bunch of things in between.

The first thing to show up in the newly risen sun is that the “Universe is always conspiring on our behalf.” What that meant to me before was that the Universe always took care of me. At the last second everything would fall into place and I could see clearly how I was loved and protected because things ‘worked out’. I had believed that so much that I rarely, if ever, worried about anything. Just trusting that the Universe would take care of it as long as I did everything right.

I no longer see it that way.

Now I understand it as “the Universe is always conspiring on behalf of our development“. ‘Development’ might mean a huge loss, or challenge, or disappointment just as easily as it might mean a crisis averted, amazing opportunity or wish fulfilled. It is my development that is the focal point, not the desired outcome.

“The Universe is always conspiring on behalf of our development”, that doesn’t mean it will conspire for things to work out like you think they should.

The Universe is neutral. It is neither positive nor negative. It just is. It has it’s cogs and wheels and churns out experiences based on it’s Algorithm. Efforts to raise your vibe, use positive thinking, repeat affirmations, etc. in order to bring about desired results are actually efforts to manipulate. You cannot manipulate the Universe. There is an underlying driving belief that ‘if I do it right, then everything will turn out in ways I like.” The Universe cannot be manipulated.

The Universe fills what is empty and empties what is full. This is something I knew before, but it was way back in my consciousness. I believe now that this needs to be brought to my forefront.

There is simply the process of evolution which requires ebb and flow, receiving and giving, highs and lows, back and forth…empty and fill. It has nothing to do with us at all. Things will be emptied even if we maintain the highest of vibes. Things will be filled even if we maintain low vibes. This is part of the formula of the Universe.

There is evidence of this everywhere. The sun comes up and goes down, as the moon goes down and comes up. This is not affected by anything anyone on Earth does or does not do. Does it make sense that this would be unique to the sun and moon? Doesn’t it make more sense that we would see this pattern in every aspect of life?

There is no good or bad. It’s easy to label rewards as ‘good’ and consequences as ‘bad’, but that is inaccurate. Who is to say what is bad? Yes, there are things that bring pain and most would agree those are bad, but what if something good comes of it? Does that change the value at all? How do you adjust accordingly?

If we toss the labels of good and bad then we are forced to look beyond feels good = good, feels bad = bad, to find a new way to define our experiences. If something doesn’t work out the way we intend, the way we dreamed, the way we hoped, but it works out in a different way that brings different rewards is that good because it brought rewards or is it bad because it didn’t bring what was wanted?

The Universal Laws for me now also have a different tone.

I still believe and understand that we are all one. Like the fingers on my hand are part of the One that is me, so too am I (and you) a part of the One that is the Universe. There have been no alterations to this one for me.

Everything is/has a vibration. Each one of us vibrates at our own special frequency. From that I have never wavered. Every thing has a vibration. Every thing. Not just people, plants and animals, but food, thoughts, words, choices and relationships as well.

When something feels comfortable/uncomfortable it is resonating with our vibration. “Comfortable” is not the same as “familiar”. When something feels comfortable it may not be familiar, but it intuitively feels right. We experience excitement, anticipation and maybe a little bit of nervousness. When something feels uncomfortable it is stretching us outside our comfort zone and challenging us. It is unfamiliar but still intuitively feels right…scary maybe, but right. When something brings discomfort it does not resonate with our vibration. When something brings discomfort it feels intuitively wrong, for reasons we may not even be able to verbalize.

Raising our vibration does not mean we magically attract/manifest all the things we want, but I think it does magically bring us the things we need. The things we want, may not be of high vibration. Or the things we want may be contraindicated to what we need. Or this thing we want now and this thing we want long term may be mutually exclusive. Also, things that are of higher vibration than we, can feel quite uncomfortable. So, how can we ever be sure that ‘this’, whatever ‘this’ is, isn’t actually high vibe after all? What we need may not feel good to us in the moment, but feel very good as events unfold. Raising our vibe does not mean that we will never be uncomfortable again; indeed it may mean that we will experience great uncomfortableness at times.

But raising our vibe is important in creating our experience of whatever comes our way. What happens, happens but how we experience that happening depends on our vibration and our vibration depends on our beliefs. So while raising our vibration does not mean our bank account magically rises, it does mean that we will feel more abundant with the amount that is currently in there.

I believe even more strongly after the Dark Night that it is not what happens to us but who we become through those experiences that matters. The events of our lives can be influenced by a myriad of variables.

They can be pre-destined, by us; orchestrated core events intended to give us the experiences we planned to explore before incarnated. They can be created by us in the moment by our choices and vibrations; a result of our thoughts, beliefs and actions that draw to us vibrations of the same frequency. They can be the result of someone else’s pre-destiny or choices and vibrations. Or possibly something called coincidence (which I don’t believe in.) Or something else entirely, I can’t even fathom right now.

And lastly, maybe even most importantly, I believe ‘reality’ is not validation of our Truth. I used to look at what was in my current reality as a reflection of my truth. After all, how many times have you heard ‘your outer world is a reflection of your inner world’? I believed that with my whole heart and so I would put great energy into adjusting my inner world according to what I was experiencing in my outer reality.

But based on the previous belief I outlined, that just isn’t so. This required a lot of recalibration on my part. I didn’t realize how deeply this belief went. That if I do all the right things, I will be rewarded. That things will come out right…and I had a very clear picture of what ‘right’ looked like and what it didn’t.

This caused me great suffering. Then I realized this was very much the same suffering I experienced when I believed in an all-powerful chess-playing God. The God that had a Plan, a Reason, a Will. I tried to appease Him, just as I had been trying to appease the Universe. It is all just manipulation. It has no merit in the System that We As The Creator have developed.

What does have merit is maintaining your Light when all about you is Dark.

Yes, that is the basis of my Faith now. The belief that no matter what comes to me, I maintain my Light. The belief that no matter what leaves me, I maintain my Light. It is not to bring to me all sorts of manifestations. Not to bring to me good jobs, wealth, health and opportunities. No. But to bring me Peace. Peace that is not dependent on circumstances. Peace that is not dependent on relationships. Peace that is not dependent on any thing of this world.

Peace that is reliant on only my Self.

That Peace will never again be contingent upon my external circumstances, but rather my internal experience to those circumstances, only. Only. ONLY. ONLY.

Therein lies power. The power to overcome any Dark Night of the Soul. Any, trying circumstance. In the movie Miracle On 34th Street, Doris Walker says, “Faith is believing in things when common sense tells you not to.” Never have these words had more meaning for me than they do now. Common sense is an earthly attempt to navigate earthly events. Faith is an unearthly attempt to navigate earthly events.

There is Light after the Dark, my friends.

And like my friend, Glenda the Good Witch says, “You’ve always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself.” I did…and I’m sure I will again.

I love you.

~Jade

The Woman In The Red Shoes

A woman stated that when she sees a pretty woman, she compares herself and finds herself lacking. Her thoughts then spiral down from there.


I know she is not the only one. I remember being like this. And in fact, while I no longer do this regarding looks, I was catching myself doing this with my business when I would see someone who does what I do, being ‘more’ successful.


Because I am always my first client of the day, I take every opportunity to explore these types of things.


A scarcity base or lack base is reflected when we compare ourselves to others and find ourselves lacking. Whether it is how pretty someone is, or how much money they have, or how well their business is going. There is enough for everyone, but somehow when we see others doing well we are interpreting that to mean we are ‘less’.


“Their success is not my failure.” This became my mantra every time I caught myself feeling inadequate because someone else *seemed* to be doing ‘better’ than I.


That was the first thing I did. The next thing I did was understand that I was externally referencing. Which means, that I was basing my value on something/someone outside myself.


We are precious unique gems that only a few people will have the heart to value. Therefore it is up to us to establish our own value independent of others.


I recall in my younger dating life that I somehow had the notion that I needed to prove my value to someone. If they did not recognize it I saw it as my job to convince them of it.


It is not for us to convince people of our value. WE need recognize it and act accordingly, accepting only those who value it. The catch is, until WE believe it, we will not be able to value those who value us.


I believe it is here, where lack and scarcity are rooted. When we see ourselves as the truly rare, unique and priceless gems we are, then the notion that “I am not worthy” becomes extinct. We no longer beg for the attention of those who do not attend to us. We no longer run after those who are walking away from us. We no longer have impoverished thoughts that keep us impoverished.


Poverty is not just about money. Our relationship with money is merely a reflection of our relationship with ourselves. Poverty is about energy.

The idea of ’empowering’ women is trending nowadays. Empowerment is about energy, is it not? Our thoughts & beliefs add to or take away from that energy. THIS is how one becomes empowered or disempowered. No one can do it for someone else. It is all ‘the man behind the curtain’ type facade.


Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain, the woman in the red shoes has all the power.

I love you,

~Jade

Making Your Life A Masterpiece

Today I saw a meme that had this to say:

The past is your lesson.

The present is your gift.

The future is your motivation.

As I read it, I heard loudly these words in response:

The past is your portfolio.

The future is your inspiration.

The present is your canvas;

Paint the shit out of it.

I am now spending the day reflecting on this. I love it. We cannot allow ourselves to be burdened with our past. We cannot allow ourselves to be defined by our past. However, in reality our past is the journey we took to get to who we are now. That deserves to be honored. It deserves a place of reverence and accommodation because without it you would be someone completely different and that is unacceptable because who you are right now, is simply amazing.

Today will be tomorrow’s Past. Can you stand to just let that be discarded? I mean what is the point of bettering ourselves if we completely discount who we used to be?

This might shock you, but I have a past. Some might call it sordid. Some might call it tragic. Some might find inspiration in it. Others might find it boring. But its mine and with it’s colors I have painted my life.

I have no shame in my game.

I am so much wiser for the experiences I’ve had. I have empirical knowledge of so many challenges that plague other people which gives me the advantage when asked for assistance.

I paint my canvas of today with the palette of colors I’ve collected along my journey. I choose to use some more than others, but I’m not afraid to color with any of them. I cherish each one for the depth it brings to my life.

beautiful calm clouds dark
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

The concept of our Past as a portfolio is delicious to me. I love that notion of a living breathing scrapbook to flip through creating no more shame than that of a third grade hairstyle in a school picture.

The notion that our Future is our inspiration is also very delicious to me. Each tomorrow is created from the vibration of the days before it. So it stands to reason that the future offers inspiration to create a Masterpiece of each and every day. The future is filled with the new colors of possibility and hope.

The Present is the only one of the three we hold in our hands – once a day for just 24 hours. The act of being present is the stroke with which we swipe the colors of our palette across the canvas. With it we create magnificence or mundanity.

We cannot create magnificence with blindfolds on. We cannot create magnificence with blinders on. We cannot create magnificence with dark colored sunglasses on. We can only create magnificence with our eyes wide, glasses off and hearts open. This is how we make the most of every canvas.

Paint the shit out of it! My most favorite part. What good is it if you are so careful that you miss the part of passion? The part that lies in the mess. The part that lies in between your fingers as the paint oozes through them. The part that lies in the unexpectedness of each moment and the subsequent color strewn across the blank canvas.

Take all the colors and make them sing! Use them sparingly or commandingly as you see fit. You and you alone are the Creator of this Masterpiece. You and you alone choose the colors. You and you alone choose the breadth, width and pressure of your stroke. You and you alone.

Paint the shit out of it, my friends.

Paint. The. Shit. Out of it.

I love you.

~Jade

 

 

13 Pieces of Wisdom

If I had to bottom line my take on living your best life, it would be this list.

#1 When People Show You Who They Are Believe Them

Maya Angelou is one of my favorite authors and this is my favorite lesson from her. I used to really get caught up in what people told me. Their behavior would show me one thing, but their words would tell me another. I always believed their words. This made me easily manipulated.

When I started to put two and two together this quote really made sense to me. People can, and will, say anything to ‘keep’ you in their illusion.

#2 Rule of Three

The rule of three applies across the board for almost everything. What you put out into the world, comes back to you threefold. Third time’s the charm. But what I mean here is the pattern formula in relationships. The first time a behavior appears it can be a fluke or an error in judgement. The second time it appears is concerning and needs to be discussed. The third time is evidence of a pattern of behavior and if the behavior is a deal breaker, it is best to walk away. The pattern is difficult if not impossible to break without concentrated effort to change.

#3 Never Go Backwards

Ex’s are ex’s for a reason. What brought you together has deteriorated and you’ve grown in different ways in different directions or you wouldn’t have broken up. Don’t look back. Don’t buy into old patterns (see #2). The exception to this is time. If more than seven years have passed and you find yourself in different places at the same time, then explore! You are both different people. Give it a try. You never know what will happen. But make sure you keep #2 close to your heart because change many not have taken place after all.

#4 The Universe Is Conspiring On My Behalf

It is easy to believe this when events we deem good come our way. When in the midst of undesirable things however, this can be difficult to embrace.

You just have to look back over your life’s disappointments, heartaches and tragedies to see how they created openings for other wonderful things to enter your life. It doesn’t mean that they weren’t painful or hard. It doesn’t erase that pain or struggle, but it does help us heal from them. Life is filled with beginnings and endings; hellos and goodbyes; starts and stops.

Knowing that everything is perfectly perfect in its imperfection and all is in Divine Timing can get us through the most confusing times.

#5 Everything Happens As It Needs To

This flows perfectly from #4. Everything happens exactly as it needs to. Exactly. You can’t moan away hours whining that you ‘shoulda’ done something different. This moment of realization is brought to you courtesy of all the moments that came before it. Not everyone’s awakening/healing will happen in the same format. What is made available to you is done so when you are available to receive it and when it is most beneficial for you.

So often we lament over “I shoulda, woulda, coulda’s”. Nitpicking over every single memory inspecting where we went wrong or where we could’ve done better. It’s a waste of time. Bread is dough until it is fully finished baking. You want bread, my friend. Be bread. Embrace the bread. (Even if you choose gluten free!)

#6 Don’t Chase Anyone Who’s Walking Away From You

Rejection is a hard pill to swallow…so don’t. Rejection isn’t a thing except in your own mind. When someone is walking away from you, either at a cocktail party or after a 20 year marriage, it is not a rejection of you. It is an expression of their needs or wants. There is nothing lacking in you that you need to feel rejection over. Nothing.

And there is likely nothing lacking in that other person either. They just have indicated to you that connection lies elsewhere for both of you. A simple, ‘thank you for clarifying’, muttered under your breath is gratitude enough! You didn’t realize that lack of connection, so be grateful they did before you spent weeks, months or years figuring it out. Next!

#7 Always Follow Your Intuition

Ever say to yourself, “I KNEW it!” after something doesn’t quite go the way you expected? Or maybe it even did go as you expected. That is your intuition. It may not (and it does not) have logic or reason behind it, but it is as true as True North. You need to cultivate that. Don’t let your brain tell you that you must justify that niggle. That niggle is your built in navigation system. This is your direct line from your Source Self. It isn’t full of fallacy like the ego mind. It is pure and clean and accurate.

As we grow up though we may be surrounded by others who have ignored their intuition. They will convince you to turn yours off to, so if you are looking to turn it back on, it might take a bit to figure out the secret codes. How to decipher between your intuition and fear can be difficult. Here’s a tip: fear will move you away from something; your intuition will move you towards something.

#8 Your Life Is Created By Your Vibration

You may have heard this already – In fact, you may have heard all of these already – but you might not fully understand it. Maybe you don’t even understand vibration. Ok, let’s get personal for a moment.

Check into your body.

  1. Think of the last time you were disappointed. How did that feel in your body? Was it heavy? Dense?
  2. Now think of the last time you had an orgasm. How did that feel in your body? Not during, but after…the afterglow. Got it? How did that feel to you vibrationally? What words would you use to describe it?

How you feel after an orgasm is a moment of your highest vibration. You can feel the energy buzzing and humming throughout your body, under your skin long after the orgasm has past. You want to make choices, take actions and have beliefs that make you feel like that, rather than how you feel when you are disappointed. Being disappointed is a moment of your lowest vibration. If you can get your thoughts to a place where they make you feel your highest vibration (HV) you will attract things, people and events that match that. Then you will respond with HV which will cause more HV things to present themselves. Its an upward cycle. I don’t need to tell you there is an equal and opposite downward cycle with low vibration, do I?

Situations that bring your vibe down are inevitable, but you can switch on your highest vibration by revisiting HV thoughts and find the closest truest thought about the current situation. (If you’ve done ‘affirmations’ and they didn’t work for you, it is because you were missing this piece.)

#9 Eliminate “Should” From Your Vocabulary

As hinted at in #5 ‘should’ is a four letter word. Ok, it’s not, but it is profane in it’s manipulations. There is and never will be another you just as you are in this lifetime. Never. Not one. Therefore, these rules that surround ‘should’ are bogus. No one ‘should’ do or be or have anything specific at any given time.

Instead of shoulding yourself, “I should do this because it is the right thing to do”, say instead “I want (or need) to do this.” We all do things we don’t really want to do, for the sake of a healthy relationship. “I don’t want to go hiking, but I do want to participate in an activity that my beloved enjoys.” Should is a derivative of guilt and guilt needs to be a non-entity in your life.

#10 Let Go Of That Which No Longer Serves You

I remember the last nigh-nigh (pacifier) that my daughter had. She used them only when she went to bed, which is how they got their name. Nigh-nigh. At the point that I intuitively felt she could fall asleep without them, I stopped replacing them. By this time she understood the term ‘broken’ and that when things were broken we could not fix them and they went into the trash. So, as each nigh-nigh deteriorated I let her throw them away. One by one she let them go. They were no longer necessary. They no longer served her.

It is the same for many beliefs/thoughts/relationship/material possessions in our lives. We hold on, sometimes, just for the sake of holding on. We need to step back and see if something is serving us. We ask ourselves, ‘is this serving my highest good?’ ‘Is this taking me towards or away from my highest best life?’ And we let go of what isn’t and allow the Universe to present what is next.

#11 Fear Leads You Away From Something

I mentioned this in #7 but it is important enough to stand on it’s own as many of us cannot tell the difference between being cautious and letting fear get in our way. Now, I am not talking about the sort of fear that tells you not to go down a dark alley at midnight. I am talking about the kind that prevents you from expanding your wings and trying something new. The one that tells your heart, you can’t.

Intuition, says “meh, no not this, but maybe this”, while fear says, “oh no I can’t! That’s foolish! I could lose everything!” Intuition will always end with an alternate possibility and feeling elated, while fear will leave you in the exact same spot feeling defeated.

#12 Never Let Them Change Who You Are

Do you remember when someone first told you, ‘don’t sink to their level’? I do and I must confess it felt binding as well as vague. Internally, I wanted to hit them low when they hit me low. I wanted to impart pain in equal measure to what I’d experienced. When I did that though, it didn’t make me feel any better. The pain was still there and something else sat like sludge over the top of it.

Why? Because I was changing my nature to match someone else’s vibration. My higher self was conflicting with the lower expression of who I was. In short, I was letting them change who I was. That’s when you have lost…when you’ve lost who you are.

#13 Strive To Understand Before You Strive To Be Understood

I left this for last, because I want it to be the last taste in your mouth. I want it to hang off your lips and be the first to fall out. This is the key to successful relationships, no matter the relationship. Too many individuals are caught up in the power struggle to be ‘heard and understood’, because they feel like they have been voiceless. In a world where no one is listening that isn’t surprising.

I was raised Catholic and one of my very favorite songs is St. Francis’ prayer. It is filled with good advice that I have tried my best to live my life by. If you don’t know it, these are the words. And you can hear it here.

Prayer of St. Francis
Lord make me an instrument of your peace
Where there is hatred let me sow love
Where there is injury, pardon
Where there is doubt, faith
Where there is despair, hope
Where there is darkness, light
And where there is sadness, joy
O divine master grant that I may
not so much seek to be consoled as to console
to be understood as to understand
To be loved as to love
For it is in giving that we receive
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned
And it’s in dying that we are born to eternal life
Amen

 

I have long left my organized religious roots behind me. Or maybe they are just at the very root of who I became. I have taken the very best of what I’ve been taught and combined it with other teachings that resonated with Truth for me.

This, ‘to understand as to be understood’ is but one.

I leave you here, with this because there is no better way to leave you.

I understand, but I will never stop seeking to do so.

I love you,

~Jade

Hold Yourself Accountable, Guru

I’m a little aghast right now. Fair warning, this will be a little rantish.

I just witnessed a celebrity ‘relationship expert’ demonstrate the most repulsive behavior. I just can’t understand it. How does society at large give such credence to people who do not walk their talk? What is it that? What has people say ‘yes, I will buy your book and invest in you despite your bad behavior” ????

When I was looking for mentors, teachers, coaches, etc…I was watching. Observing. I was very careful to find someone who looked like a better version of me. Because if they weren’t better a version of me, how could I look to them to help me become the best version of myself?

I’m not talking about someone who is perfect. No. I am talking about someone who is consistent and congruent. Just that. I mean, if you can’t resolve your own conflicts, how can you inspire others to resolve theirs?

Hypocritical. This is all I kept thinking.

She was so obsessed with being understood that she became blind to trying to understand the other person. This is key in relationships.

Relationships are two way streets. They are not just your relationships. You co-own them with others, which means their feelings and perspectives are just as important as yours. When attempting to resolve issues, it is important to get out of your own head and try to get into theirs. Now this other person might not be interested in that, and that’s ok. If you are the ‘expert’ you will know how to handle this. And handling it does not mean shaming that person, nor slandering them, calling names, nor embarrassing them. Yet, that is what this ‘expert’ did.

This person has books. Does tours. Holds retreats.

How does this happen? I really don’t understand. I don’t understand how people accept that. I also do not understand the confidence of someone to call themselves a ‘relationship expert’ when they don’t do their work. Again, not looking for perfect. Not looking for someone who doesn’t go on a rant on occasion. I am looking for someone who knows what it means to take accountability. One who is seeking to understand more than to be understood. One who controls their ego, not one who’s ego is out of control.

“Use your big girl words.” That’s what I want to say.

My daughter, at the age of 22, in a verbal disagreement with a 43 year old woman was called a ‘bitch’ by this woman and simply came back with ‘and I think you are a little two-faced’. We don’t call names. We don’t throw labels.

I have been in some dark times. Some trying times. I’ve been overwhelmed and undervalued…

but I never ever let what someone else is doing change who I am.

Consistency and congruence are my measuring sticks. I never ever want to be a hypocrite. I revere other people’s lives too much to sell anything other than my 100% best.

I am not perky all the time. I can get snappy. I get frustrated. And when I act a fool I apologize. I examine why I let it get to me and learn from it.

I do that by asking myself why this is happening. What in me is allowing this? “She brings out the worst in me.” That’s what she said. Well, ask yourself why relationship guru. Why do you think that is? Why does this person who doesn’t know you and can’t know your triggers keep tripping them? And why are you not taking responsibility for those triggers?

Yes, responsibility for your triggers, lies with you, not anyone else. It’s not anyone’s job to walk softly around your triggers. It is your job to understand your triggers and defuse them like the landmines they are. I usually add in a ‘thank you for showing me this’, if not to the person, then to the Universe itself.

I have also processed out loud with groups of like-minded individuals. I don’t pretend I have it altogether. I completely am transparent in disclosing that this is hard for me and I can’t figure it out. “I know this and such, but I can’t get my mind on board” kind of thing. In fact, I just did that in one of my groups, facing one of the biggest challenges of my life. You know what? People respect that and appreciate it.

Please, when you are looking for ‘expert’ advice. Research who’s advice you are taking. Do they tell you what you want to hear, or what you need to hear? Do they tell you things that expand into your highest best self or shrink into someone else’s mold?

Be you and if you need help with that, find someone who has mastered themselves.

I love you.

~Jade

 

 

 

Keto WOE vs Keto DIET

Let me first start out by saying this was supposed to be a private thing. This was written for two Facebook support groups. One called “Push For Your Better” and the other “Ketogenic Diet – motivation group”. It was denied approval by both groups. I am disgusted and will be leaving them both. Or maybe not, maybe when you are done reading you can explain to me why this would not be approved. *edit So, it appears that the link to my blog is the problem with the post and why it was not approved. In fact, it got me essentially kicked out of a third group. 

My Keto Friends,

I have been watching, mostly from the sidelines, as I traversed my own Keto journey. Lately I have been feeling overwhelmed by the emotions behind the posts ‘I’ve been doing Keto since _______ and have only lost ___ pounds’. Some are super heartbreaking, in that they have been doing it a long time with proportionately little loss. While others seem to be skewed, being on the protocol a few weeks with what I would deem a proportionately significant weight loss.

This has been haunting me.

Why? Well, let me share a bit about myself so you can get the clearest picture. I am a Life Enhancement Specialist. I am an energy healer with a 30 year career of social work to go with it. What that means is I’ve taken all the experience from my years working with humans in their worst moments and combined it with my equally as long career of metaphysical healing work (sacred work) to facilitate opportunities of growth and healing for others. I help people connect what is going on with their bodies to what is going on in their mind and heart.

I have struggled with weight issues since I was 24 and started on birth control. I’ve struggled with body image issues though since I was 15, 5’2” and 115# when the doctor said, before even looking at me, “So, I see you’re carrying a little extra weight.” Though not particularly athletic, I had an athletic build. He changed his tune after examining me, but the seed was planted and took root.

I am a hippie-dippie, gypsy, tree-hugging, lie naked under the moon, health conscious, holistic, naturpathic and homeopathic woman of 53 years. I know that the physical body is only mirroring the emotional and energetic bodies. I have worked on my internal stuff religiously and openly, while assisting others on their path of healing. None of this work helped me lose weight, though. Not that I intended it to, but do you remember the time when the big tag line was ‘it’s not what you’re eating, it’s what’s eating you’?

Well, sometimes it’s not.

Sometimes it is the food you are eating. Which is where I am now. Learning how the ‘healthy’ way of eating that we were taught, and that I’ve been following religiously, has made me sick. It started in January 2018, when I learned about the Whole30 protocol. I went 42 days. I only lost 10 pounds, but I also lost ‘Fibromyalgia’. Since day 21 I have not had a single Fibro symptom! FOOD! Food was the cause, but no doctor ever even suggested that could be an issue. They just offered me pills.

I stayed true to Whole30 for the next three months. I added back what I really wanted to, and what didn’t seem to affect me. Despite this by June I had only lost two more pounds. Something was still not right. Then I found Ketogenic. I was grateful for the Whole30 start because switching to Keto was a breeze. I had rid myself of most of the carbs and addictions by then. It was just a matter of letting go of the sweet potatoes and the high amount of veggies I was eating. Plus I got to add back in dairy, which I had missed. Easy.

Still the weight loss has been slow. It even prompted me to write about it in my blog, finally. The scale is not my friend. Everyone is different but the stories of rapid weight loss were weighing on me (pun intended). I didn’t get on the scale often but that almost made it worse, because I would think ‘after this long the scale must have moved a lot!’ It hadn’t, yet I was fitting into clothes that I was originally wearing at a lower weight. I found myself disappointed, de-motivated and ready to give up. But I don’t allow giving up, so that caused me to once again look inside.

Why was an arbitrary number holding so much value for me? I delved into it and wrote about that, here https://willowsongmedicine.wordpress.com/2018/09/08/its-not-about-the-diet-its-about-life/

What I realized is that I put more value in the number on that scale than the myriads of other evidence showing me that this is a resonant path for me. It revealed my dependence on external validation. It was a huge breakthrough for me. If you have the time, read the post. It was really powerful for me.

So, that brings me back to today and why I think so many of your ‘I’ve only lost____pounds….’ posts are haunting me.

This is a way of eating (WOE). It is not a diet. I see a lot of you saying that, but you aren’t living it. If you are relying on the scale for validation of a job well done, then regardless of what you say, you are looking at this as a diet. If you are looking at your life and seeing validation of a job well done in many places, then you are truly seeing it as a way of eating. Does that make sense?

It isn’t the scale or the protocol that is in question, its your perspective (which is developed from your programming.)

Our bodies, our minds and our spirits are intertwined. You can’t fix one and expect the others to magically align. You have to work on them all simultaneously. If you are looking for a scale ‘high’ to replace the ‘high’ from carbs/sugar you aren’t addressing the real issue…your need for a ‘high’. That’s addictive behavior. The need to see fast results (whatever ‘fast’ means to you) instead of realizing you are just doing something good for yourself. That’s a dependence on immediate gratification; the underlying premise of addiction.

When you are accepting a new way of eating you are changing your whole lifestyle to a more mindful experience. Without that awareness you are just doing a fad diet.

You are doing yourself a disservice if you are not doing your inside work along with the Keto WOE. I believe that it is those who do not do both sides of the work that gain the weight back or struggle the most (going off and on, can’t get back on etc.)

So there it is. My thoughts today. I hope they help.

*end

So, now this becomes a full on blog post rather than a little group post. Which is me being extremely transparent and breathing big. 

I love you. 

~Jade

 

Lessons From The Water

I recently started swimming again. Who knew you could join the fitness center and pool at the local high school? I certainly didn’t! What a gift!!

barefoot beach blur break
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

I have always loved to swim. In pools. In lakes. It never mattered. I love being in the water. With my new found pain free existance and my physical alignment, I am moving better and realized how amazing my body feels after swimming now.

What I didn’t realize is the emotional stuff it would impact as well.

Water represents emotions and I knew that going in (to the pool.) I wasn’t surprised that it gave me inspiration, but I didn’t expect it to stir up my emotions. Which is kinda funny, because why wouldn’t I? Why didn’t I?

Movement does that. And movement in water would do that more. I have been paralyzed to some extent for a long long time because of the inflammatory effects of the foods I was eating. This storage system was a perfect keeping place for my body to hold the energy of past events. So, as my body has come into alignment with my spiritual alignment things are being released and experienced as they move up and out of my body. Movement in water, would only enhance the emotional releases.

So, quite literally I’ve been swimming in old memories and the emotions related to them. One after another rises up to my conscious without warning – like they tend to. At first I was stunned. “Why would this come up, now?” “Where is this coming from?” It was a quick minute to realize that this was resurfacing and I did not allow myself to get stuck in the current revisitation of it.

There is a point where you can get caught up in that resurfacing and begin to relive it rather than release it. Its a choice you make. Or maybe its a habit (though a habit is indeed a choice.) It just takes a simple thought to keep us on track, “This isn’t current. This is making its way up and out.”

Though these memories catch me off guard, I have decided I like them. I like that they are resurfacing and leaving my body. I love it, actually. Its new for me, and I welcome it. I do. I feel like this is just another Healing Rite of Passage! Sort of like going through my house and purging out all that no longer resonates and the satisfaction I get at each bag of trash or donation items I take out.

How do I know these are resurfacing to be released? Well, the curious thing is that these are memories I haven’t thought about in years…decades even. They just popped into my mind in relation to a thought about a body part, ie: the throat, for instance. When the memory picture popped up there was only a shadow of the emotions felt at the time. I could’ve easily fallen back into them with my thoughts, but did not. Then, lastly, after that the memory is gone and I cannot at this moment remember anything other than it occurring. No memory of the specific memories that resurfaced.

How cool is that? But that’s not all…

Swimming is more than exercise for the body, it is exercise for the mind (meditation) and for the Spirit (metaphor for the Universe) and for the energetic body (aura cleansing). Water is the elemental representation of the Universe. All the things that are true in water are true in Life.

  1. If you struggle, you drown. (Struggle indicates misalignment aka suffering)
  2. To float you must surrender. (Go with the flow)
  3. When you float you are fully supported by the Universe with no effort on your part. (The Universe is conspiring on your behalf)
  4. It is never good to hold your breath, but rather to breathe fully, efficiently and at the right time. (The breath of life is an even in and out, receive and release motion.)

We are Spiritual beings in an Elemental vehicle. It is a mistake to choose one over the other as more important. You cannot attend to one and neglect the other. And when you attend to the elemental vehicle, using as many of the the elements as possible is important: air, water, fire and earth. Find ways to incorporate all of these into your physical care of your physical vehicle.

Suggestions:

  1. Swimming
  2. Bonfires
  3. Sunbathing
  4. Boating
  5. Hiking
  6. Picnic on the ground
  7. Meditation on the ground
  8. Moonbathing
  9. Brisk walking
  10. Sauna
  11. Hot baths
  12. Floating (in a float room)
  13. Hot yoga

Anything that uses at least two of the four elements will be more beneficially charged. Swimming outdoors on a sunny day in a lake would be the optimum as it incorporates all four elements of air, fire, water and earth.

Too many of us are locked inside concrete walls and have time outdoors marked as superfluous or for special occasions. We need the elements in our daily lives, even if in just small doses at first. In the midwest, this is almost automatic in summer with yard work or #lakelife, but we need to make it a priority in the winter as well. A good ole snowball fight is just as beneficial as time spent swimming in a lake. And out in a snowstorm?! Even better!!!

Let me know what miraculous things happen for you when you use the elements like this!

I love you.

~Jade

 

It Always Comes Down To Choice

There are only two ways to live your life: as though nothing is a miracle, or as though everything is a miracle. ~Albert Einstein

This simple quote affected me in quite a magnanimous way. Suddenly, everything made sense. It all comes down to what we choose to see.

Today I was in Meijer, grocery shopping. I’ve had a stress-filled couple of days including 9 hours in the car. I didn’t feel like showering or putting on make-up but we needed food. So, I threw on a tank top, some yoga pants and ran a brush through my hair.

As I walked through the store, I noticed how my body is moving differently. With all the foods I’ve eliminated, the inflammation in my body is also being eliminated. I notice muscles that seem to have been too paralyzed to move before. I notice how I walk differently, using different muscles, standing straighter…feeling straighter.

As I gathered the items needed I was also creating a recipe in my head. A roasted garlic cheese dip, to be exact. I hadn’t found a recipe that sounded quite right, so I’m creating it in my head as I shop, hoping it will be finished so I can gather all the ingredients.

One of the things I love about Michigan is the people are so nice here. More noticeably so than anywhere else I’ve been. I love making eye contact, smiling and exchanging greetings. Everyone this morning seemed to be particularly engaging.

I was walking through the store, with my recipe creating in my head and also thinking how really awesome Life is, and how the Universal Laws are always in effect…even if you don’t believe they exist. I had such deep gratitude and admiration for how things have shown up at my life, at just the right time as I’ve become more in alignment. All pieces have to be in place in just the right order for them to be most effective. But the beautiful thing is, you don’t have to know what that order is, you just have to work on your alignment and they fall into place!

Everything in Divine Timing. You might want to work on one thing, not realizing that something else, or multiple things, need to be aligned before that original thing.  It might be months or even years before that thing sees results, which can be disheartening if you aren’t paying attention to all the other issues coming into alignment.

The past 4 years I’ve been on a roll, even though it hasn’t felt like it. This year though it is quite evident, and I can see exactly why events needed to take place exactly as they have. Exactly.

Back to Meijer…as I was standing in the baking aisle, attempting to find sugar free chocolate chips with no artificial sweeteners, it happened. One of those crystal clear revelations. I was standing, staring at the shelves of baking chips, when this woman interrupts me to tell me about this great mixed nut find she uses as an alternative to other nuts for baking crusts.

She just started talking to me. She didn’t ask me a question about what I was looking for or what I was baking. She just offered her expertise. I found myself wondering why she chose me to reveal this secret to. I have no interest in this information at this point. I’m not even looking at the nuts.

And then I thought, “I’m really glad that I am someone with whom others want to share their experience. I’m glad she felt comfortable sharing this with me.” She was brief, didn’t take up much of my time (though time surely slowed down for all this awareness to happen.)

And in that moment, I realized I had made a choice.

I could have been annoyed or I could be grateful.

I was crystal clear on that moment when someone makes that choice. It was as if I was out of my body watching the whole encounter.

Is this one of the surprising side effects to being in alignment? It’s so strong that others are compelled to engage with you? As an empath I’ve always been someone with whom others share personal stuff rather easily, but it hasn’t always been healthy. I remember once, being trapped by a woman in a Kohl’s bathroom because she had positioned herself between me and the door and wouldn’t stop telling me about her life problems. My friend actually came to find me and pull me out after a half hour of waiting for me. But this doesn’t feel like that. This feels like something else altogether. This feels magical. It feels like a reward; sweet, kind and without boundary violations.

Life is an illusion of our own creation. That’s it. In a nutshell. You can either paint with all the colors of the pallet or stick with brown and black. It’s completely up to you. Everyone gets the same pallet, but a different canvas; it’s up to you to choose what colors go on that canvas.

monochrome photography of frames
Photo by Jimmy Chan on Pexels.com

My friends used to call me the Queen of Reframing…and I am, I suppose. Have you ever picked out a piece of unframed art? You fall in love with this piece on canvas and then begin looking for the right frame to really bring out the parts you love about the piece. The frame changes your experience of that painting. The right frame can turn a simple insignificant piece of art into a masterpiece. Of course, the opposite is also true. It can completely ruin a piece and make it undesirable. 

Framing is an art.

So (as it so often is in my writings) it is in life. At any point we have the choice of which frame to put on a particular painting.

When I get up every morning I choose the types of frame at my disposal. So when that lady approached me in the grocery store, it wasn’t random. That frame is in my energy field which communicated a resonance with her. This is how she knew it was safe to share with me. I walk through my life with that energy following me, preceding me and surrounding me.

The really beautiful thing is that it has a blossoming effect. You start with the mindset…that choice of frame. That leads to an improved vibration which feels good. This goes out into your energy field and resonates with other like-vibing things (people and events), which draws them to you. These improved experiences resonate with you on a higher vibe which feels good and improves your mindset. You then respond with an even higher vibration and the cycle starts all over again.

This is how it works. Life. It’s what people mean when they say you get back what you give out. It isn’t about usurping the natural process of life that ebbs and flows. It is about maximizing those flows and managing those ebbs, though.

It is how you make the most of life.

And that is where I shall leave you for today. In the very magical place of choice.

I love you.

~Jade

 

 

To A Facebook Acquaintance

I know you are angry.
I know that below that anger is hurt.
And I know that below that hurt is fear.
 
I know.
 
Don’t tell me I don’t know, because I’m not you. It makes no sense. Because you see, you are not me, therefore by your own formula you can’t know, whether or not I know, because you don’t know, because you’re not me.
 
See, the thing is I can’t hear you when you are angry. I can’t hear you when you are screaming. The louder and angrier you get the more I shut down. The more I don’t want to hear you. I cannot focus on your words or your wounds, because all I hear and see is your behavior. Its frightening. As frightening to me as that which you are yelling about.
 
It doesn’t mean I don’t care. It doesn’t even mean I don’t agree, I just can’t be with that energy you see. I can’t align with you there, in that place.
 
Everything is anger with you. Your anger is so loud you cannot even hear those who support you. Your anger is so big it blinds you to those who stand with you. It prevents you from seeing that you are part of the problem. That anger is part of the problem. That anger can never be part of the solution.
 
Solutions live where anger can’t. Anger is not of the heart, it is of the mind. You convince yourself that anger is passion, it is not. It is fear and where fear is, passion cannot breathe. Passion lives where there is Peace, because Peace has no limits. There it can live and breathe unfettered. It can have life and solutions can come forth.
 
But they will not come while you are angry. They will not come while you are screaming. They will not come while you flail your arms.
 
They will not come until your mouth quiets and your mind opens.
Until your heart opens.
Until your arms open.
 
I know there is pain and fear. I know there is hurt. I’m not asking you to put that aside. I’m asking you to let go of the anger that created the problem to find the solution.
 
I’m asking you to BE the solution.
 
I love you.
~Jade