Personal Development Is More Than Just Meditation & Positive Thinking

I grew up hearing Robin Leach’s voice chiding, “Champagne wishes and caviar dreams” while most people were ‘living on a beer budget’. Thus the era of DIY was born and stores like Home Depot, Lowes’ and Menard’s got their boon.

My husband remodels and renovates homes for a living and the pitfalls of DIY are prevalent. An abundance of flipping and fixer-upper television shows has only made matters worst in recent years. Good for us, as their ‘oops’ keeps him in business. Why all the ‘oops’?

There are things you can’t know, you don’t know.

You just have to look at the myriads of ‘Nailed It‘ Pinterest posts to really understand how something ‘so simple’ can go ‘so wrong’. Now imagine that with two by fours and tile.

In the eighties, health clubs were the ‘in’ place to be and a slew of personal trainers hit the market. Everyone who was in the vicinity of being physically fit was calling themselves a personal trainer and charging outrageous fees for their time. Not everyone who has gotten themselves into shape have the skills and tools necessary to help others in their goals, however. Yes, you know how your body responded, but everyone’s body is unique and you can do real harm. There are things you can’t know, you don’t know. Eventually the industry began to regulate itself, some standards were put in place and now there is some consistency and quality in the profession.

Today I see that same thing happening in the area of personal development, self-help, and/or spiritual evolution whatever you choose to call it. A lot of people are hanging up their shingles with titles such as Wellness Coach, Lifestyle Coach and Life Coach (to name a few), offering their services to patrons who might not really even know their own needs. Yay that you raised yourself above your situation, but again there are things you can’t know, you don’t know when working with other people. Just like the Personal Training industry established standards to ensure consistency and quality, I have every faith that the personal development industry will do the same. In the meantime though, it is buyer beware.

Concerns

There are two categories that concern me. The first is the “I Just Went Through A Really Hard Time And I Want To Help Others” type. And the second is the “I Walked Away From A Six-Figure Corporate Job To Follow My Dream Of Being A Coach”. Some of these may or may not have a certification to do such a job.

Honestly, a certification is just an attendance indicator. It certifies that ‘this person attended/participated in this training and fulfilled all the requirements’. You have no idea what those requirements were. You have no idea what the qualifications of the certifying institution are! You have no idea how well the person integrated the information presented. You have no idea how well the person implemented the information into their own life. Do they walk the walk or just talk the talk? Think of it in terms of a degree or diploma…you know the person graduated but you have no idea what their GPA was. No wise employer hires someone strictly on the basis of having a degree alone, they always do an interview, right? They ask important questions and listen to the answers. This is how you need to hire any kind of personal development professional, but I’m getting ahead of myself.

Back to the two concerning types:

“I Just Went Through A Really Hard Time And Now I Want To Help Others…”

This type is well intended. They are on a high from their shift in perspective and want to do something more! They have the drive!! That’s awesome, however that drive really needs to be applied to their own further development. DIY personal development is awesome, you certainly can get very far on your own with a few tools, this however does not translate automatically into your being a good teacher for others. I see so many starting to work with others before they are even done working on themselves.

There is a personal inventory that needs to take place. Yes, you have left this relationship and you feel amazing, but have you adjusted the things that caused you to call that into your life in the first place? Just understanding it wasn’t good for you and making the decision to end it does not mean you now have the skills to have healthy relationships, nor does it mean you have the skills and tools necessary to help others do it. I’ve been watching online entrepreneurs in this arena for the past four years. I have seen the majority of coaches ‘out themselves’ and I don’t think the anyone is paying attention. I have seen this time and time and time and time again…

They start off with promotions of beautiful professional photography in front of houses, cars and relationships they’ve ‘manifested’. They have great copy talking about how great their life is and how they can help you too. This goes on for awhile, then one day you might realize you haven’t heard from them in a bit. They disappear only to resurface later with new promotions; “I’m six months sober and I have learned so much. Let me help you too!” or “I finally walked out of my abusive marriage and found the love of my life. Let me help you too!” I am left wondering how many of their clients in the meantime wasted their money -or worse – were damaged while these ‘coaches’ were still figuring out their own lives.

Before you begin your path as a personal development professional you have to have your big ticket items handled.

Beyond that, you have to have a certain amount of time with them under your belt, because you don’t always know you have it mastered until you are challenged again…that’s how the Universe works. This is not to say that as Personal Development professionals we do not have things we still need to work on, nor that we won’t have situations come up. There is always room to expand and life always has curve balls, but how that is handled distinguishes the professional from the amateur.

The second type: “I Walked Away From A Six-Figure Income To Follow My Dream…”

What have they done exactly that might indicate they are good at being a personal development coach? Ok, so they had a six-figure income. That alone is not a measurement of personal development, we have only to turn on shows like “Real Housewives” to prove that. How does having that background indicate higher evolution? What credibility does it lend? What have they done exactly? Ok so they followed their dream. Do you know what that dream was? How long did they follow it that now their dream is working with others? Or is this just a way to make more money than their dream affords? They have left a high paying job, to pursue selling themselves to others as an expert at something and yet actually proclaim nothing. Ok, so they quit, learned to meditate, spout positive thinking and this makes them inspirational? I don’t think so. I think they have cornered the market on self-promotion and that is all. They are selling the unsuspecting buyer on their image with no substance. Personal development is more than meditation, magical thinking and motivation.

How can either of these types help their clients build solid foundations for getting through challenges and improve their experience of life? Foundations that will last the rest of their life? Maybe they know what worked for them, but how do they know what will work for another?

Personal development is real and deep work. It doesn’t happen by just repeating affirmations, stating goals and thinking positively. Nor does it happen by mimicking what another has done.

There is an influx of ‘coaches’ in the personal development field. A wave of well-intentioned motivated individuals dedicated to help others traverse rough terrain in Life. In truth, I love it. I love that so many who have done their work are breaking free of the problem focused models of Psychiatry, Social Work, Therapy etc. to embrace a more solution-focused model. What I don’t love is those who haven’t done the real work to move on to the next step in being a personal development professional. This isn’t about ‘being new’ because everyone has a starting point. This is about 1) doing your work, honestly and truthfully and realizing that you must always stay on top of your own stuff; and 2) about doing the additional work to gain the skills to help others.

Its about understanding why what worked for you, worked and why it might not for another. Its about understanding how the human mind works and why it works that way. Its about understanding the Soul and how it works within the elemental body.  Its about understanding the differences in learning styles and how one problem might have several solutions. Its about knowing how to facilitate for others so they can determine which of those solutions is right for them. Its knowing how to set someone up with the right lifetime tools for them. Its about understanding how every problem has a unique origin and a single cause as the same time.

Ya ya ya, but do I need a professional?

So now that I’ve laid all this out, how do you know how to choose the right sort of personal development professional or even if you need one?

Let’s start with how to determine you even need a personal development professional. It isn’t a question of how to determine if you need personal development. I happen to be of the mindset that personal development is a lifelong journey. As long as I am alive I am developing personally. Some don’t have that notion. They would not be interested in personal development and that is certainly ok!

So you are interested in personal development, you don’t have any self-limiting beliefs or irrational fears, things are going great in your life, and when bumps come up you have a healthy network of supporters and excellent coping skills. You understand that the Universe conspires on your behalf and you see that clearly, even when things don’t go the way you expected. You don’t need a personal development professional. 

You are interested in personal development, you have a ton of self-limiting beliefs and irrational fears, things are not going according to plan and you notice you keep dating the same sort of person who may or may not remind you of one or both of your parents. You smoke, eat sugar like its candy (hee hee hee) and don’t like to talk about your problems. You need a personal development professional.

You aren’t opposed to personal development, have everything you could ever want but you still are not what you would call happy. Something seems to be missing. You have a good job (or not) but it doesn’t fulfill you like you thought it would. You struggle in relationships often wondering if something better that might come along, but a bad relationship is better than no relationship. Your friends don’t seem to have this figured out anymore than you do. You need a personal development professional.

Of course there is a full spectrum of examples, but this should give you some kind of idea.

Now for you DIY type people, I suggest you re-read the first part of this post, and possibly look up some Pinterest-gone -wrong posts as well, just as a refresher. You are a responsible grown adult (assuming) and you have all the capability in the world to DIY personal development. The thing is, you don’t know what you can trust. You can’t trust your programming because you’ve already decided it hasn’t been working thus far. You can’t know, what you don’t know. This programming has been installed since your birth by your parents, community, school church and peers. It is this programming, insidious in nature, that is creating the problems you haven’t yet been able to isolate, eradicate and replace. You can’t see you from where you are sitting. In some instances this would be like cleaning your house with the lights off at midnight. Technically, you could do the job, but it will take you much longer and you are bound to miss stuff that will show up when the sun rises. Fresh eyes on the task, not to mention a fresh brain with a wealth of new resources to pick, will make for swifter success and results that are more likely to stick.

Whom To Choose

Wow, now that one is not so easy, because no matter how hard I try I will forget (or not be aware of) someone. Forgive me if you are personal development professional and I’ve left you out.

There are money coaches, mindset coaches, life coaches, business coaches, love coaches, relationship coaches, NLP coaches, manifesting coaches, holistic health and wellness coaches, transformational coaches etc.. (Are there any without the term ‘coach’? I couldn’t find any.) There are the metaphysical types; psychics, mediums, intuitives, empaths, and energy healers.  Energy healers include Reiki, QiGong, Crystal, Therapeutic Touch, Shiatsu, Bars and so so soooo many more!  This list is not exhaustive by any means, but you get the idea.

How do you possibly choose? Good question.

First of all decide whether you want a more metaphysical or practical approach to your adventure. That cuts things in half right there. Secondly, decide what you want your focus to be. Do you need extra help with your relationship with money or in romance? Is that your focus? Or do you see yourself needing to address issues across the board of your life? Is your business your main focal point? Are you experiencing some chronic or acute physical issues? Answering these questions will further narrow down your search.

Once you’ve narrowed down your focus you need to start googling what you can expect of that genre. If you think a money coach is what you need for instance, google money coaching and see what comes up. Educate yourself on the trainings and programs out there. Research those institutions, look up their curriculum/accreditations/qualifications. Note which sounds most responsible to you. Then start looking for individuals. Remember that certifications are just indications of participation. Do not let them be your only criteria. If someone has raised themselves from rags to riches that’s pretty good criteria, too. (Just be sure to vet the story, as stated next.)

After you’ve selected a few individuals its time to do your due diligence in researching them, too. Cyber stalk them…well, not really, but flush out their social media presence. Do a deep dive, don’t just take their website’s word for it. Go hunting on social media platforms. Note if they have all positive messages one week but then go on rants the next. Google the snot out of them. If a recent arrest record comes up, you can easily scratch that one off the list. What relevant jobs did they hold previous to this? Scroll back on their personal pages as far as you can (send a friend request if you can’t). Look for discrepancies in their timelines. Note if they might have a personal profile and a separate professional profile, what does that say to you? Yay or Nay? Research them thoroughly, you are about to put your life in their hands for remodeling. You don’t want to treat that lightly. If you see reviews on their social media business page then see if you can message that reviewer to get more information.

Narrow it down to no more than three individuals and schedule interviews. From their professional side of things they will call it a ‘discovery call’ or a ‘free consultation’, but you need to control that narrative. You are interviewing them as much as or more so than they are interviewing you. If you don’t feel the vibe, then pass. Use your intuition rather than your logic. Too often logic takes us away from what we need rather than towards it (because logic is instilled programming and is highly influenced by fear-based propoganda). We can be ‘sold’ on something because it can seem logical, but in the long run not actually in our best interest.

Finally

So there you go. My manifesto on personal development professionals. I never intended it to be this long, but if it serves its purpose (to get the right client in the hands of the right professional by educating the consumer) then my work here is done.

Personal development drives me. It has driven me ever since I can remember. It drove me into Social Work, where I had less occasion to assist others in this manner than I envisioned. And it drove me to pursue opening up to assist others in a full-time professional capacity as well. I love it. I love everything about it. I love how we hold the truth within our own selves and how amazing that realization is when it comes. I love how we have the power to heal ourselves in so many ways! Sometimes we just need a little guidance on how to focus that power, that’s all.

I’m here if you need me. You know that.

Oh…

and I love you.

~Jade

 

 

 

 

 

My Magick Medicine

I was tasked by a mentor to write about my medicine in an exercise. 

I have the capability to see what isn’t seen and hear what hasn’t been said, to heal what hasn’t been healed. The magic to make the scariest moment totally surmountable.

From the moment someone contacts me, if we are a good match the healing energy begins to flow. I don’t even know if I’m ‘supposed’ to manage that or if that is just what is meant to be. It no longer drains me, I manage that, so perhaps this is how I know when we are in sync? This healing can be so powerful -even before commitments are made- that often that is all people need from me.

I create a space of pure self-empowerment. I empower no one. I only remove the layers of density in place that have convinced my clients of their powerlessness; like Michelangelo released David from the Marble.

I support, assist and facilitate. I facilitate opportunities for experiential exploration, assist is looking/interpreting them and support finding one’s own answers. This is the true Medicine Woman way. Not to fix things, but to allow the Self to realize there is no brokenness to fix.

Having a Medicine Woman support you is rather like the difference between using GPS and a map. GPS will tell you exactly how to get there, with (hopefully) no missteps. It tells you exactly how long it will take there and will suggest detours when delays occur. But with GPS you don’t learn how to navigate your own path.

But a Medicine Woman is like a map. She is a tool that presents  ALL the possible routes to get you where you want to go, which route do YOU want to travel? Which one suits you? If you get caught in a relationship/job/mindset, what way do YOU think is best to continue your journey? You learn how to navigate your own path which is a lifelong beneficial skill.

As always….

I love you.

 

~Jade

 

Jade’s work is different and we think you will find it effective and economic. It combines Jade’s knowledge and skills cultivated over three decades of psychiatry, human services, hospice, geriatrics, crystal healing, QiGong, Reiki, and Therapeutic Touch with her natural Spirit given gifts of intuition and being an empath.

Check out our Healing Rite of Passage Me-Treat & Workshops for 2018 

To schedule services please review options here and email Jade here to make arrangements.

Gratitude And Discomfort

Gratitude is on my mind today and its a bit of a surprise.

I was lying in bed, feeling a bit sorry for myself, to be honest. Wondering if I’ve made a mistake pursuing this path. Wondering if I put too much stake in the vision I’d had so many years ago of Quan Yin. As I checked into my body I felt familiar heaviness taking over. I pulled myself out of bed, made a cup of coffee and went back to my bed for my morning rituals.

First I smudge to cleanse myself and my space, marking it as sacred time. Then I pull a card from the first of two decks and then journal about it. Then I pull a card from the second of the two decks and journal again. This ritual serves me so well and its hard to explain in words. I never ever ever ever evvvvvvver fail to get an answer that serves my highest good.

So this morning, I pull the first card after thinking I need to re-evaluate my whole life plan and BAM! the last line of the passage contains, “Your medicine is strong…” The moment I read these words, I know their truth. I feel it in my bones. I feel remiss for my moments of doubt. I write through my process to come to the place that allows for expansion and I feel twice as big as I did moments ago when I was lying in bed wandering in the dark.

I pull the second card and this is not a BAM but a flick of a lightswitch. It takes a minute for me to process through to the connection. The majority of the message was about blessings coming, but within the context of that message was something more…it was gratitude, and it hit me in a new way.

The energy of the concept was different today. I’ve known gratitude. I was in on the beginnings of the ‘attitude of gratitude’ train. Gratitude and I are old friends, but there is a new depth to the word today when combined with the first card’s processing.

Gratitude in and for the present moment AS IT IS. Too often I see people (myself included in past times) trying to pull themselves out of the present moment by grasping for things to state gratitude for. The effort is in getting themselves out of the moment that is providing discomfort rather than being grateful for the discomfort itself. Do you follow?

I really held that in my breath and seep into my bloodstream. A new depth to gratitude is not to use it move myself out of discomfort but to appreciate the discomfort. To know that the discomfort has its place too, usually to launch us into a huge expansion and a place of beautiful comfort.

It always comes. It never fails. As if to ‘test’ me though the moment it comes almost seems to get pushed back further and further the more I surrender. Its like a game…’how far can we push her until she goes back to old habits?’ Today’s message assures that I won’t go back to old thinking, if I’m constantly staying grateful for the present moment. Grateful for the discomfort.

Whenever I think of discomfort I remind myself of how uncomfortable it must be for sprouts pushing up through the dark earth. How uncomfortable must they feel right before they push through the surface and feel the sun? How long must that climb feel? What if that precious little sprout gave up, thinking that its dreams of being a flower were too big? Where would our world be if we all gave up like that?

So I practiced. I took the dogs for our morning walk and just stayed in the current moment. The moment right in front of me and practiced gratitude for that. For whatever I was feeling, because I was indeed feeling it! Feeling discomfort means we are still alive and we are working on something big!

Discomfort is the place our growth begins. It tells us that where we are, no longer suits us and something bigger is waiting for us. More discomfort comes when we don’t make efforts to move on to that bigger place then. The discomfort can fool us. It can make us think that the movement is the problem. That we are in discomfort because we moved somewhere we shouldn’t have, rather than because we haven’t moved far enough.

Moving anyway isn’t always the answer either. Just moving to move can move us in the opposite direction of where we intend. So sitting with the discomfort, having gratitude for it and allowing what is next to appear is the best guide for moving through it.

Discomfort in the dark soil is what causes the seedling to sprout and move up towards the sun, in the first place. It doesn’t decide to give up. In fact, it never even considers that as an option (or maybe it does and I just don’t know because those are the ones that never make it to the surface…Hmmmmm…..thoughts to think on.)

We have a choice. We can allow discomfort to give us the excuse to not move or we can allow it to propel us forward. It really is that simple. A choice. One little choice and then another, another and another. Before we know it we have expanded into an even better version of ourselves on our way to another expansion into an even better version of ourselves.

Where’s your discomfort?

I love you.

~Jade

 

Jade’s work is different and we think you will find it effective and economic. It combines Jade’s knowledge and skills cultivated over three decades of psychiatry, human services, hospice, geriatrics, crystal healing, QiGong, Reiki, and Therapeutic Touch with her natural Spirit given gifts of intuition and being an empath.
 
To schedule services please review options here and email Jade here to make arrangements.

 

Reveal

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The after effects of the Self-Reveal Challenge are continued exploration into peeled back layers that is me.

I discovered that I really like sharing myself, much more than I ever have or ever thought I would. Sharing who you are is a gift to yourself. Keeping all that goodness to yourself is a crime…and know what else? Its suffocating!! Better yet, its keeping your hands tied.

So, here’s to never doing THAT again!! I’m an open book!

I’ve been thinking about ‘reveal’ from all perspectives for the past week. All aspects and sides of it. I even looked up it’s origin and that really took me deeper.

from re- ‘again’ (expressing reversal) + velum ‘veil’

Reversing the veil.

Wow. That is powerful.

Reversing the veil we put up to project a certain image out into the world. The veil of protection that cloaks what we feel is too personal or imperfect to share.

I call bullshit.

I spent nearly a decade walking with the terminally ill in hospice and from that honor I learned SO much.

One of the greatest reveals I ever witnessed was in hospice.

We had gotten a new admission on Friday and according to the nurse this was a patient that we were apt to have for awhile, so I waited until first thing Monday to see her. Upon arrival Monday morning, I found a woman anguished and in discomfort. I called into the office to get the nurse out as soon as possible, but it was going to be awhile.

The woman, let’s call her Nellie, had no possessions in her extended care facility room. No pictures, no belongings of her own. As a hospice Social Worker I travelled with everything I might need, including a CD player and reading materials. I put on specific music and began to read to her from the journal of dying, death and grief poems I’d written.

While the music played, I read poem after poem, pausing long enough after each to allow her Spirit to glean from the words that hung in the air. With each poem her face melted into its angelic form. The anguish that aged Nellie disappeared revealing what lay behind the weathering earthly worry and fear had painted upon her. The veil she’d worn for probably forty years or more. By the end of the last poem Nellie’s breathing had shallowed, her face was angelic and nothing about her was anguish. 

Not long after I finished the last poem she smiled broadly, sat straight up with arms outstretched in front of her and then folded her arms into a hug across her chest, she lay back down and took her last breath.

I cannot paint with words her beauty that had been hidden behind the veil she weaved with strife and suffering.

I suspect she was never so alive as when she put it down in that moment before she transitioned.

Reveal.

Reverse the veil, before its too late.

I love you.

~Jade

P.S. The picture is not Nellie, but all beautiful women need to have their picture shared!

Self-Promotion/Self-Reveal Challenge Summary

Its the first day after the challenge and I know it wasn’t meant to be five and done. I’m meant to continue revealing myself so that others who need me can find me. So, that I’m more comfortable. So this becomes old hat.

Revealing oneself is easier and harder than you think, all at once. The hardest part is right before you do it, just like many things. The decision to do it, to be it (transparent) is the hard part. Once you’ve made the commitment, its actually quite fun. I really enjoyed sharing my success stories. I love sharing what it is I love to do. I liked sharing the ‘Reason’ or ‘my why’ if you will.

I challenge myself to being revealing every day. To write revealing posts. To share my offers when appropriate. To be always 100% me, no holds punched.

Here’s what else I learned. I don’t have to do self-promotion. When I am self-revealing I attract my tribe; friends, clients, business relationships etc.

I like how it feels being exposed, no more secrets. No more withholding information in an effort to be ‘professional’, or ‘healed’ or whatever it was that I was thinking.

Revealing is being Real. Its being authentic and we aren’t being real or authentic when we aren’t being revealing.

The key is that being revealing isn’t self-promoting. Self-promoting comes from a different place than self-revealing. I see that clearly now and that will make all the difference.

I love you.

~Jade

Day 5 Self-Promotion/Self-Reveal Challenge

Broken Egg
An egg does not break, it breaks open.

This is day five of my shameless self-promotion challenge and I find myself a little lost for words today.

My thoughts on the challenge today are about ‘self-reveal’ than anything else, so I’ve been sitting with that today. Just sitting with it.

Deeply.

So, this is going to be more of a journal entry than a story telling post.

I feel something coming up through the depths to rise to the surface. It’s there just out of sight. I can feel it. Something huge. Something about revealing.

About standing on the stage, so to speak, saying “Here I am! I have SO much to offer and I’m worth paying for!”

I can speak to small and large groups without much of a sweat. I can facilitate very powerful retreats for as few as one, and as many as twenty. Why is that so hard for me to talk about then? I know that I had these leftover beliefs of my mother’s that ‘pride goeth before a fall’, that ‘you make yourself last until someone else makes you first’ and ‘vanity is a sin’. That is a lot to overcome, but I’ve recalled that energy. I’ve denounced those beliefs and I feel indifferent towards them now.

So what IS it? Why does talking about myself seem clumsy, disingenuous and awkward?

Perhaps because it is still new. Perhaps its just like blisters on your feet when you wear new shoes. It doesn’t matter if I’m clumsy at it, I just need to do it. To offer my support and promote my services whenever I feel they can be of assist. Without shame. Without feeling judgement for doing it.

What I’ve learned from doing this the past five days is that it feels good, not shameful to share my accomplishments. I am not boastful. My intention is not based from ego. I am proud of my accomplishments and take great pride in assisting where it is productive and appreciated. I love adding my energy to others to push through blocks that have proved challenging.

There is nothing more satisfying to me then hearing a client say ‘I never thought of it like THAT!’ or ‘OMG that makes SO much sense!’ Or to know that after one of our sessions an opportunity presented itself to my client ‘out of the blue’.

Its magic pure and simple.

What I do is magic, but it really is magic everyone can aspire to. KNOWING that makes all the difference.

I love what I do, because I love you, because I love me.

~Jade

L(i)FE – part 2

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This is the sequel to L(i)FE to further explore our Life Force Energy (LFE), and how your lack of care for it can have disastrous results on your physical health.

How It Works

We are sentient beings (Soul-our piece of Source) experiencing itself via an Earth Generated Operating System (EGOS – aka personality) and Spirit (Life Force Energy – Qi our Soul’s presence on Earth) through mental, emotional and physical opportunities.

The Breakdown of Illness, Disease and Disorder

When you fail to nourish your Qi from the five wellsprings of Qi (Source, Sun, Moon, Earth & Universe), you begin to use up reserves for daily living and invite illness, disease and disorder. Illness, disease and disorder are messages of the Spirit. Trying to get your attention to tend to what you are missing. Each aspect of our lives has physical and metaphysical properties.

Spiritual

The Spirit is the connection between our soul and our physical existence. The Spirit communicates with our mental and emotional aspects to lead us on our path. The path our Soul laid out before incarnation. In conjunction with Source our Soul outlined certain events to give us the fullest experience of whatever it is it desired to explore.

Spirit and EGOS work hand in hand in this experience to set the stage for the opportunity for the Soul’s experiment with contrast.

Earth Generated Operating System (mental)

The ability to process information, make decisions and cognitively process your experiences lies in the mental realm. This is the basis of the the Soul’s experience here on Earth. This is how/where experiences are translated and run through the belief system with Spirit.  This is the drive train of the human experience. This is where alignment or misalignment begins. Spirit connects with the mental as a first line of expression. Mental is where our understanding of Spirit is born and translated to the emotional.

Emotional

Our emotions are the first communication of our alignment (or misalignment) with our Spirit. Our mental realm is incapable of emotion and therefore cannot tell when its thoughts and beliefs are aligned or not aligned. Therefore the mental realm depends on the emotional realm to assess whether the physical experience is aligned with Soul’s purpose.

Depression and anxiety are two pieces of emotional evidence that thoughts/beliefs are not in alignment with who you are. Thoughts can propel you towards your destiny or away from it. Depression and anxiety are the result of beliefs that are in conflict with your highest self and your destiny. This discord, left unresolved will result in physical ailment.

Body

The body is the last place alignment/misalignment shows up. This is a last call, of sorts, to get you to pay attention to your spiritual self and get in alignment with your Soul’s purpose.

Let’s decipher a message from the liver as an example. Physically, the liver is the body’s chemical “factory.” It takes the raw materials absorbed by the intestine and makes all the various chemicals the body needs to function. The liver also detoxifies potentially harmful chemicals. It breaks down and secretes many drugs.

Your energy field acts like a filtering system. Metaphysically, the liver represents the aspect of your energetic filtering system that detoxifies harmful energies you encounter. It allows you to process what happens to you energetically and enables you to function. Illness, disease and disorders of the liver tells you that there is a breakdown in this process, that you have overloaded yourself with negative or low vibrational individuals/events/actions.

When we ignore our Spirit our emotions will send us notice, first. If we choose to ignore the message then illness develops.

This build up of misaligned energy is called suffering.

It is unnecessary.

I love you.

~Jade

If you are looking for a L(i)fe Force Energy Healing Session please email me at jadewillowsong@gmail.com. I work with all budgets so please do not let temporary financial resource blockages stop you from taking this step.

 

 

 

Smoke And Mirrors

Illusions…
All of life is a mere collage of illusions. Some more illusionary than others, but all illusion nonetheless.
Life is a lot like a house. On the outside the house may have a certain presentation and you may draw a lot of conclusions from the outside that have actually nothing at all to do with what is on the inside.
From the street you may be able to see inside the house through an open window, but even through this open window what you see is limited. You don’t get the whole picture of the workings of that house and the people in it that make it a home. You have no idea if there is abuse, neglect or unconditional love existing in there. All you know is what you see, but what you see is no where near the full square footage of the house.
Even if you are invited in, you don’t know what is going on in the rooms you don’t see. You also don’t know what goes on in the house when you are not in attendance.
Some people live in houses made all of glass and are super transparent and yet there are still places not visible to general bystanders. Others live in houses built like a fortress without many portals or windows. Still others build a house of smoke and mirrors where everything is twisted and warped to deceive you into believing something else entirely.
Smoke and mirrors.
Even when you seem to witness something you are not witnessing the entire situation. You have no idea what preceded it. You have no idea of anything outside of those exact moments, so to infer a meaning into them is irresponsible.
Life is an illusion. It was created that way on purpose. So that we could have experiences that seem real in a place where nothing really is. The only thing that is real is love and light. No matter what illusion you get involved in, remain in your space of love and light. We are the love and light and to the love and light we will return.
This is where my faith lies.
Some illusions will break you…if you let them; or they can break you open…if you let them.
All things are made whole again.
~Jade
Jade Willow Song is an Intuitive Qi Therapist who works with individuals seeking healing, clarity and guidance on their life path by facilitating transformational experiences. 
Jade serves others with her experience and education in metaphysics, crystal healing, Reiki, Therapeutic Touch, QiGong, guided visualization and meditation. In addition, Jade is an ordained minister with the Universal Life Church.
Jade holds a Bachelor’s in Social Work as well as certifications in Reiki and Therapeutic Touch.

Support Female Personal Developers

I’ve been thinking…(uh oh)….

There is an underlying pattern of misogyny in the genre of personal development. It isn’t intentional, mind you. I’m beginning to theorize it as a result of conditioning. Although ‘touchy feely’, ’emotions’ and ‘naval contemplation’ has been ‘seen’ as a woman’s field just google ‘personal development speakers’, or ‘motivational speakers’, or ‘personal transformational speakers’ images and you’ll find the majority are males.

And these males? They collaborate with males. They might have women on their teams behind the scenes but they partner up with males or they cite other male professionals as resources.

But here is where it really hit my heart… as I observe polls asking for recommendations for self-help gurus, the majority of answers, EVEN FROM WOMEN, are men. This is where the real misogyny is taking place.

Confidence and the presentation of it, is at the heart of this.  What do I mean?

Men take up more space and aren’t ashamed of it.

As I watch some of my favorite online male counterparts I am in awe at how some manage to be charmingly cocky (I do not tend to favor cocky otherwise) to kindly confident. They make no apologies. They don’t seem to cater to anyone and they are bold. BOLD. Not as in daring so much as they speak like they know their shit is TRUE. They take up space without asking permission.

As I watch some of the familiar online female counterparts I see some trying to wear men’s pants figuratively and it feels out of place. It comes off cocky and not authentic. It seems like one trying to play like a man as a woman. Rather than just play like a woman.

I am not anti-male, in any shape or form. And I’m not whining about being a woman….I wouldn’t have it any other way. I see the value in balance, but right now there isn’t any balance. Its odd for me to google recognized professional speakers to find male dominance, but see a preponderance of females in the not-so-recognized online world.

I understand nature, so I don’t see this as something ‘contrived’ by humans. Look at almost any species and you’ll find the male dressed in the brightest, boldest colors, loudest call, most aggressive and most recognized. It’s in their nature. The bolder look imprints upon us, so when we think of a peacock it is the male peacock that immediately comes to mind. Same thing for a lion, a cardinal or a deer. Males natural tendency to be more aggressive makes them more notable and memorable.

So, I’m not blaming the men at all.

I just want to bring awareness that just because a female is not all bold and aggressive does not mean she is not as capable of serving, especially in the personal development arena. We have ‘softer’ ways, like the gentler hues of the female peacock vs the bold colors of her male counterpart.

I want to remind my female counterparts that you don’t need to ‘sell out’ to find success. Don’t try on the bold male colors that aren’t your palette. Titles like ‘badass’, ‘gangster’ and ‘warrior’ feel disingenuous to me.  It seems like a false sort of confidence.

Does that make sense? Does anyone else feel the energy incongruence thing happening here?

Confident women, ARE. When I think of confident women in the personal development field I think of Iyanla VanZant, SARK, Brene` Brown, Marianne Williamson, Maya Angelou…just off the top of my head.

I cannot, by any means state that any woman who uses these terms in disingenuous, I’m saying to me it feels like we women have been sold a load of men’s suits and have been trying to tailor them to suit us, rather than just wearing what suits us authentically.

If you are an authentically bold woman with a more masculine energy, GO FOR IT!! But if you are not, please don’t try to emulate a male’s approach to what you are doing. And please don’t think I’m suggesting you just substitute ‘badass’ with ‘goddess’ either. It’s perfectly ok to just BE, without a popular label.

I just want to remind everyone of the abundance of capable, effective and inspiring female personal developers out there and suggest you recommend them to your friends as readily as you do our male counterparts.

Our society is masculine heavy. We NEED a balance of yin and yang to reach our full potential. We NEED the bold brash yang energy of the male workshops that get you all pumped up and ready to break free of the astral gravity holding your ass in the chair in front of the TV. But we also all NEED the gentle beauty of yin energy in the female workshops to get you to really connect with your life force energy.

*Full disclosure, I confess, this post was written mainly for myself, as a reminder to not see my male counterparts as more successful because they are louder and brighter and seem to have more engagement and to quit trying to tailor suits for my womanly shape.

 

~Jade

Jade Willow Song is an Intuitive Qi Therapist who works with individuals seeking healing, clarity and guidance on their life path by facilitating transformational experiences. 

Jade serves others with her experience and education in metaphysics, crystal healing, Reiki, Therapeutic Touch, QiGong, guided visualization and meditation. In addition, Jade is an ordained minister with the Universal Life Church.

Jade holds a Bachelor’s in Social Work as well as certifications in Reiki and Therapeutic Touch. 

Touchy-Feely Never Killed Anyone

The news of the mass shooting in Las Vegas at the Country Fest struck me deep in my empathic center this morning. It has brought to mind a lot of thoughts and I need to get them out.

As I was growing up I often heard, “you’re too sensitive” and “you’re too emotional”. They meant it like there was something wrong with me, and I should change to be more like them. I had feelings and I talked about those feelings. It was no wonder that my dream then was to become a therapist. I wanted to help others talk about their feelings in a safe environment.

While I stopped talking about my feelings to those people, I did not stop expressing my feelings. I expressed them in poems, in short stories and to others who would listen. But along the way, I can’t tell you how many people I came across who said, ”I don’t believe in that touchy-feely shit.” Or claim “I’m not one for touchy-feely stuff.” Or just plain “I’m not a touchy-feely kind of person.” Or “Should we all just hold hands and sing kumbaya?!”

People think touchy-feely-kumbaya people are weak. But they aren’t the ones who break, are they?

Mass shooters, serial killers and mass murderers aren’t the touchy-feely ones. You never hear of a ‘flower child’ suddenly snapping and using a gun against another. Those who commit violent crimes, especially of mass proportions, are the ones who have gone out of their way to avoid touchy-feely. They are the ones who stopped when someone said they were too sensitive or emotional. They were the ones who had no outlet for the organic touchy-feely parts of us.

And you wonder why they pop?

This is a pressure cooker situation we’ve created, of course there will be mounting explosions…

…unless people start getting touchy-feely.

Lately I had been feeling as if the ‘Life Coach’ genre was becoming a bit over saturated and I pondered whether it is just another fad (yes, in part). I will be the first to tell you that half the life coaches I run across, have no business being “Life Coaches”. I use the umbrella term “Life Coaches”, but it includes many other titles, including Spiritual Advisors. Many of these people are carefully camouflaging themselves with touchy-feely leaves whilst not actually dealing with their own stuff in a healthy manner.

There is another breed out there though. Those people who truly are looking to facilitate transformation for others but doing their own touchy-feely stuff as well. People like Kyle Cease who gets on stage and says “hey can you help me process this?” And goes on to stand naked on the square as he works through an issue with an audience member. Him facing his own shit, was the ONLY way that guy from the audience was able to hear the message that was meant for him. Kyle didn’t PRETEND to work through his shit, he authentically did it.

This new breed does deep down dirty touchy-feely work. Its not life coaching and its not therapy. Mystic Midwifery is what I call it, because it is the birth of your authentic self. The one that got put back into the box little by little with phrases like “you can’t do that, you’ll never succeed” or “you need security” or “you’re not good enough” etc…ad nauseam.

There is a plethora of transformational facilitators who are truly motivated and authentic in their practices to assist others in their journey though the rough parts. They do this by demonstrating on a daily basis how they apply certain practices and philosophies in their own life. They don’t take a template and place it over your life, but instead assist you in making your own template. Its about giving you the tools once to use over and over again. Their goal is not about growing a ‘list.’ It’s about being authentic and real, then spreading that.

The numbers of these “Authenticity Coaches” is growing. I don’t think this is a fad, I think it is needed. I think the world is ready for a change and here are the change-makers! Here are the people ready to hold space for others to relieve the pressure in that pressure cooker. Here are the people ready to say “you are sensitive, here’s how we manage that”, “here are the tools to express your emotions”, people ready to throw touchy-feely life preservers.

We don’t need gun control, we need emotion control. We need cohesion. We need community. We NEED transformation.

As I sat at a bonfire this weekend, it occurred to me that sitting around a campfire was a part of everyday life for our ancestors. It was around the fire that feelings were shared, stories of experiences were shared and bonds were built. It was built in touchy-feely time. Silence was not uncomfortable as everyone gazed into the hypnotic flames of the fire. This was meditation for our many of our Western ancestors.

Then came the radio which provided a more entertaining form of gathering. People gathered around the radio listening to the news and shows, but then talked about it. It wasn’t a diversionary tactic, it was a tool. It was used purposely and then put away.

With the inventions of whole house furnaces, making fireplaces a luxury and TV providing distraction (and becoming addictive), the organic ways our families and communities bonded, decompressed and meditated disappeared. As a result our society is disintegrating. Literally dis-integrating. Even weekend bonfire are an excuse to party, not to be bond and connect. With of course the exception of certain religious sects where it fire has retained it’s sacred purpose. And again, it is not those people who end up in the headlines as murderers.

Its time to get back to touchy-feely.

Its time to embrace the transformation movement, because if EVER we needed a transformation it is NOW. I don’t want to see how far things can get. I don’t want to the worst humans can do to one another. I’ve seen enough.

I’ll close with this, only because I didn’t know where else to put it. I’ve heard so many people make statements around how they were raised ‘tough’ or how they avoid expressing emotion and then they end that statement with “…and I turned out just fine.”

It never ever fails. My only thought in response to that is, “did ya, though?”

I love you.

~Jade

If you are looking for a L(i)fe Force Energy Healing Session please email me at jadewillowsong@gmail.com. I work with all budgets so please do not let temporary financial resource blockages stop you from taking this step.