Over-reacting; Too sensitive; Emotional; Reading too much into it; These are a few of the words used to describe me over my life. This is how I was shamed out of relying on my intuition. In fact, at one point it was so bad that I purposely made choices opposite of what my intuition told me.
You might imagine what a mess that made of things.
A real mess. The worst decisions I ever made in my life happened during that time period. Our intuition – and everybody has one – is our Soul’s GPS. It is meant to guide us on our journey through life. It is the closest thing to an owner’s manual that we have. So why do people try to talk us out of it? Because they don’t want us to see their deceptions.
The deceptions they have created to hide their own insecurities – not only from others, but from themselves as well. They don’t want to see what we see. They don’t want to feel what we feel. They don’t want to hear what we hear. So selfish. Other people putting their fears onto me, making me doubt myself, making me feel crazy, just to keep up their appearances.
This impacted my life in such a huge way. Sometimes, I feel like that whole dark time of my life was wasted. Our intuition is a part of our light and when we deny it we are flying blind. I would’ve lived a whole other life, because I would’ve made different choices – the opposite choices, actually. But regret is not an option, because everything happens for our highest good and so I hold to that.
Understanding now that my intuition was a gift meant for me to navigate life consciously, I look back on the dark time with new eyes. As I reflected upon the truths I knew but were denied, I felt anger initially and then power.
I was, am and always will be powerful beyond measure. I knew what they tried to hide so fiercely from me. I knew. I knew and that unnerved them. I knew when I wasn’t wanted. When I was lied to. When I was betrayed. I knew and that scared the crap out of them. They would do anything to keep their secrets. That’s on them.
As I reflect back on that time with these new eyes, it’s as if I did make all those other choices. It’s like I never lost power. Never lost a step. Never made the wrong decision. Which means, of course, there was never a wrong decision in the first place.
Its empowering, enlightening and enlivening. Its a new day. This awakening has caused a huge shift. Huge. Suddenly it is as if the movie of my life went from black and white to high definition resolution full spectrum color. Now, when I see it in my mind, it is no longer dark, but illuminated.
Follow your intuition.
Easier said than done? I know. I get that. I didn’t even know what intuition was (primarily because those who would’ve taught me needed me to ignore it). How do you understand something that has no words, just vibration (before you even know what vibration is?)
It’s the parent’s responsibility to teach their children to honor their inner knowingness. If parents support a child’s intuition, even when (or especially when) they are picking up on something you don’t want them to know, then they will learn to follow their intuition. Not discounting or dismissing their feelings is the only way to teach a child how to use their intuition as the gift of navigation through life.
While it might be uncomfortable to talk about when they ask you why Daddy is sleeping in another room, tell the truth. Because when you try to hide such life events from them they feel conflicted between what their senses are telling them and what you are. This creates such great self-doubt. You are not protecting them. You are harming them.
Our job as parents is to prepare our children to become independent contributing members of society. So, even if we could, protecting them from the events of life wouldn’t be doing our job. Life is full of events. Some are harder than others and cause us to expand in ways events of pleasure cannot. It is a disservice to the adults our children will grow to become when we fail to prepare them by showing them how to deal with the unpleasant.
But what can I do now?
You as parents develop the future by how you raise your child, but what can you do now to develop your own intuition? The answer is ‘sooooo much!!!’
Start with simple things like anticipating which elevator door is going to open. Guess the time before you look at the clock. Guess who’s calling before you look at caller id. If you haven’t gone into a metaphysical shop to look at crystals, put that on your calendar. Go in and hold the ones that appeal to you. Hold them and see how they feel. What comes up? Do you feel heat? Cold? What does your intuition tell you about the crystal? Is it for you? If so, purchase it.
The best thing you can do to develop your intuition is communicate. When you sense something from someone you trust, ask them about it. Take the risk and express what you are you sensing. Be prepared that they may not fully disclose. What you really need is the practice expressing your impressions. The more you do it the more you will be able to discern when people are not being honest with you. When they give your their answer and you are not satisfied, when you feel ‘something isn’t right’, then you know your intuition is right on.
It’s ok. When it’s their business they have every right to keep it private. That isn’t what this is about. This is about you and learning to trust your gut. By expressing what you are sensing you are actually expressing belief and confidence in your ability. That’s all it needs to grow.
When you can see through the veil someone has put up, its unnerving. So it’s understandable that people get nervous. Let ’em off the hook. Let ’em have their secrets because you now have the key to all of it – it doesn’t matter if they validate you. No one needs to validate what you sense in order for you to know it is true. You will feeeeeeeel it.
Start making decision with nothing but your intuition. Start with something inert, like trying a new restaurant. Then by picking out a book to read by just the title. Maybe take a drive without a destination and see where you end up. Intuition is a beautiful beautiful thing. It will take you places your brain could never dream.
Don’t second guess. Trust yourself. Trust that voice within you. Before you know it you will be making the bravest leaps with no logical reason and experience the most amazing outcomes!
The most important thing to remember…
If you ever wonder, “Is this my fear speaking, or my intuition?”
The answer is SO simple! Intuition moves you towards something. Fear moves you away from something. My intuition never feels like fear. It feels like “nah, I think this instead.” Fear on the other hand is all “I can’t. No way. Never. I shouldn’t.”
One more thing…
I love you. Always have. Always will.