Judith Klemos

For those who have been following me for awhile, you might have noticed I have changed ‘titles’ several times. It has never been easy ascribing myself a label. I’ve always lived with the idea that I don’t have a box, so therefore no place for a label on me.

For those who have been following me for awhile, you might have noticed I have changed ‘titles’ several times. It has never been easy ascribing myself a label. I’ve always lived with the idea that I don’t have a box, so therefore no place for a label on me.

But when you are wanting to be of service to others it is helpful that someone who needs you, can actually discover you and to that end, labels are assistive.

So how did I settle on Sacred Healing Facilitator?

Let’s start backwards. Facilitator. I have always shied away from calling myself a healer. I suppose I am, but because I imagine myself to be more of a conduit, ‘healer’ never seemed to feel quite right.

A facilitator is “a person or thing that makes an action or process easy or easier”.

Well, that is what I do. I facilitate a lot of things for a lot of people. ✓

Healing. We’ve already discussed my definition of healing, but for those coming in late…

Healing: The raising of personal vibrations to an individual’s optimum level of peace.

Healing looks like different things to different people. It is not so just like an open wound on your arm that closes and disappears with time.

Much healing can take place in the last phase of life before transitioning.

Now, Sacred. While defined as something religious, Sacred does not mean that for me.

Something sacred has the highest resonance. The highest vibration. Sacred is the ultimate reverence and respect. It is the highest honor.

For many sacred might relate to religion, for others it might relate to spirituality, for still others it might relate to consciousness. In my experience, even atheists experience something sacred.

Being a Sacred Healing Facilitator in a Modern World

Previous generations were strongly connected to their church communities and had direct access to their religious leaders. The church community was referred to as a ‘family’. Today however, that community is known as a ‘congregation.’

Having direct access to a religious leader was of great comfort to families. They often had the same minister perform marriages, baptisms, and funerals for members of the same family. The minister was an extended part of the family.

As the last two generations have gotten away from dogma, doctrine and organized religion there is a bit of a void. While individuals are taking back the power over their own spirituality, they lack a confidante, minister and healer. They are lacking someone outside themselves to administer spiritual/consciousness healing and comfort.

As a Sacred Healing Facilitator it would be my privilege to step in to fill this gap as individuals transition from organized religion to self-directed spirituality. I am receptive to providing ministry to those who are estranged from organized religion but have a need for an adviser, elder or guide, with no need to subscribe to a certain dogma. I aim to fulfill reverent needs at times like weddings, blessings, namings and funerals, as well as offer support and guidance in times of crisis such as trauma, end of life and loss.

People used to have family doctors. One doctor for the whole family from crib to crypt. I am using that as my model. How amazing to be a sacred witness to weddings, baby blessings, living wakes and memorials all in the same family. How comforting would it be for a family to have a familiar face standing with them at such sacred times?

By the same token, I may be needed to minister to those who already have a strong relationship with their church community, but need assistance to facilitate difficult conversations about end of life issues, completing advance directives, planning celebrations of life ceremony and help navigate the emotional waters around that.

A shift is happening in our society’s experience of death. Death was once seen as a natural part of life. With modern medical advances, things that were once life threatening became almost neutralized. Death became an enemy to be beat at all costs and not a natural transition from a well lived life. Extending our life expectancies created a denial, as death was whisked from our homes into sterile hospitals and funeral homes.

This sterility has caused a problem.

It has removed some very important parts of mourning. It disallowed anticipatory grief, because the idea that ‘we can beat this thing’ is the motto until almost the last exhale. It disallowed acceptance by labeling it ‘giving up’. It disallowed conversations about last wishes and good-byes, by labeling them ‘negative talk’.

Let me ask you something.

Have you ever talked about winning a big lottery pot? And if so, did you ever win that big lottery pot? No? So, just talking about something does not have the power to make it a reality, right?

Now, let’s apply this to the conversation about dying.

If I feel like death is a possibility and I am allowed/able to talk about that openly with my loved ones early on while I still have the energy, I can have meaningful connections with my loved ones. If I pull through, I have still made meaningful connections that only enhance my life.

If, on the other hand, I feel like death is a possibility but I am not allowed/able to talk about that openly with my loved ones early on, there will less meaningful connections. There will always be an elephant in the room that isn’t discussed. Words left unsaid. “Thank you’s” left undelivered. “I’m sorry’s” left on hearts. “I love you’s” left dangling.

These are precious gifts stolen from those who need them most – when they need them most – just because we are uncomfortable talking about death.

What if I’m wrong?

Exactly. What if you talk openly about the possibility of death and you are wrong? Then you’ve had deep meaningful moments, thereby making more memories and when death does comes to you in the future, you will have had the experience of acceptance and the peace that there are no words left unsaid.

If instead, you deny talking about the possibility of death and you are wrong, you have lost the opportunity to have those deep meaningful moments forever; because by the time it is determined that death is imminent, there is little energy left for such things.

I believe this is a disservice. I believe there is healing that comes from sharing our fears, our disappointments, our uncertainties, our sorrows and even our anger. I believe there is quality of life when the truth is laid out on the table like a feast to be digested. I believe that in the shadow of silence lay regret.

I believe the healthiest approach to anything is a holistic one. If, while you are aggressively fighting your illness you still make room for meaningful end of life conversations, then that’s living. Time spent writing letters filled with advice or good wishes on a special day can’t ever be a waste, can it?

I also believe that a well thought out plan for your funeral or memorial service is a precious gift you can give to your loved ones.

I know these thoughts might make me seem weird and I’m ok with that. Someone has to be and I’ve got it down to an art by now.

Yes, Sacred Healing Facilitator. This is my calling. My Soul’s purpose on this Earth during this lifetime.